The only thing I've ever wished is to be happy. That's been my prayer. I figure it's the one thing you can't wish you hadn't wished later on, there is no consequence to asking God for it like asking for a specific job or in my case, a specific person. I thought I wanted to be with someone, wanted nothing more than for them to turn around and see me. But I didn't wish for them, never asked God for them even though I wanted to. I bargained, said that I knew I would be happy with them, blissfully so, but nothing was coming of it. No progression, no fulfilling of that fantasy.
So here I am writing that God, you were right- when I asked to be nothing more than totally and completely happy I realized life isn't always going to give you the person that you think will make you happy. However I know one day you'll give me the boy of my dreams, my soulmate instead. The man that I laugh with, spend all my time with, who listens to the same music I do and will dance around the room with me. The guy who made cute animal noises back, even in front of friends. Who will look at my family, who I used to be, and won't ever walk away. Who still looks at me when I'm not paying attention, opens his eyes when we're kissing to see my face. The one who tells digressive stories, will walk around for miles with me, whose voice on the phone at midnight is the most beautiful thing I can imagine. The one I can cook with, fall asleep with- never feel alone with.
One day that relationship won't be what I expected, but it will be what I deserve.
Dear future you,
I love you like you'll never know.
Like 'love you' isn't enough to say it.
You will be the answer to my prayers.
